Friendships Lost in Recovery

Sobriety is not as simple as making a decision to no longer drink beverages containing alcohol. For me, for most people who have drank hard enough, long enough, alcohol has twisted and tangled into every aspect of our lives from drunken antics, to our sober, warped brain dysfunction. Sobriety, therefore, is not a simple choice of beverage. Sobriety, if successfully accomplished, changes everything.

Once I got over the hump of my first year of sobriety, that’s when I really started to notice the changes. Most of the cravings for alcohol were gone. Most of them. A clear sunny Saturday afternoon when all of my responsibilities were covered for the week could still make me long for an IPA on my back patio, but the pull to drink was rare and weak.

After a year of sobriety, small joys of life started to actually bring me pleasure. My neurotransmitter function was returning to near-normal, and the fog of alcohol-induced depression and anxiety began to lift.

After a year of avoiding social events, my sobriety muscles had grown strong enough that I could stand in a crowded room of friends and drink soda water with a lime without feeling shame about my sobriety. That was huge — alcoholism is the disease of shame and stigma, so moving past that into, “I don’t care what others think of me,” territory was a big transition.